The first song

I'm sorry that I've been so inactive lately; just when I think that I'll have time to keep my blog updated and keep up with comments, I end up being busy! But to make up for it, here's a fairly long post: 

First, I've posted my first song cover! It's a Japanese pop song called 'Yellow' (with an English translation in the description); the main reason I haven't posted in so long is that I wanted to have done my first cover, and I knew I wanted for this to be my first video. 'Yellow' is a very happy and uplifting song, and I thought it was perfect for my first song, as the lyrics fit perfectly with my reasons for singing now. It's a fairly electronic song, but I plan on doing other types of music, too. (Or, perhaps "other styles" would be better, considering that most of the music I like and feel comfortable singing is Japanese... but I'll make certain to put a translation of the songs in the descriptions when I can!)

I've also changed the appearance of my blog; I feel like my tastes (in everything, really) have been changing to be more cheerful, colourful, and bright... Much like all of the sweet colours and sparkling things I like more and more, I think I'm becoming more honest with myself--like I've been finding the courage to be honest. I'm always creating whimsical, mysterious things, but I don't think I'm really so whimsical or mysterious at all, or at least not much, or maybe in a different sort of way; I've begun to care less for seeming elegant or ladylike, and now I say the silly things I want to say and wear things with glitter and sometimes dance in the hallways during morning break at school. (I suppose, looking back, my blog has really changed along with my personality over this past almost-year, hasn't it?)

Also, a few months ago my art teacher was kind enough to help me with a photo shoot of some of my artwork (well, she really did most of the work during the shoot). I haven't posted much art here, so I thought I would post the pictures! ...Or rather, I would post the pictures, but right now I have no way of getting them onto this computer. I promise I'll post them soon, though!

Next is what I'm most excited about: I'm working on a picture novella series loosely based on The Nutcracker and the Mouse King which I'm going to post in installments here. It's always been one of my favourite fairy tales, but I've also always found it a bit... disappointing. Eventually I thought, 'Why not just write my own version?', intending for it to be a short fairy-tale. As I thought of more ideas for it, though, it grew into more of a full-length fantasy story, which I've always wanted to try writing. 

(Well, actually, I have been working on that sort of story--for about three years now!--but I feel as though it will still be developing for several more years; almost like I was told in a dream that it would be the best and most important thing I'd ever write, so years of thinking and feeling will need to be put into it. Some things I've posted here were written from that story's herione's point of view.)

Anyway--I'd originally intended to call it a "light novel series"--the light novels I'd read were all short novels with a lot of illustrations--until I looked it up and found that it's more characterised by being simple and fast to read, and not always a short novel with pictures. Since the plot will be fairly complex and my writing style isn't always simple, I decided to call them "picture novellas" instead. The current title is The Manipulator and the Clockmaker, but I'm not sure whether I really want to call it that or not, so it will probably be changed.

Here is the character design for the main character, Marie:

(Well, really, it's the version of it I posted on my Facebook page, as I can't get to the actual file right now; the real character art is fixed a little bit (and less blurry), so I'll post it along with the other pictures.)

Hopefully I will have more time to post and comment from now on. Thank you, everyone, for always being so kind to me!

Lost Story No. 21: The Ghost Story of Marienne; or, The Secret Halloween Party at Midnight; Part I

I woke at midnight to celebrate a secret Halloween. Rolled up striped stockings, slipped into my nicest black dress with lots of panniers underneath, fastened my prettiest shoes I never wear, tied my hair in ribbons, imagined I had a pretty little black hat. I couldn't leave the house for fear of waking up the Lady and her Husband, so I went to Wonderland.

Bruder and Schwester were waiting there, in an odd village I'd never seen but called Home anyway. They had changed; they were the Bruder and Schwester from that time before, when they were a good deal younger and I was a little bit older, when it was only the three of us in that tree-shielded house, when we'd forgotten who we were again. They had dressed for the occasion, too. Hand in hand, we walked through the jack-o'-lantern lit village and into the Forest.

In the Forest, we met a story-teller. His stories were short and never seemed to have an ending; he told us several stories of girls who wandered in the woods at night and one story of a marionette who fell in love with a certain piper. As he began a longer story about a dead bride who fell in love with a living bridegroom, a crow picked him up in its beak and carried him away.

We walked deeper into the Forest where time stopped at midnight to the House of Sweets where time stopped on Halloween, stepping through the shortbread door to the some-hundred-year-old Halloween party. Spiced black tea and German biscuits and marshmallows and fine china made of sugar candy and a pumpkin pie (which, sadly, I had made with tinned pumpkin, as it was really July outside of the Forest) were set out on a Baumkuchen table surrounded by guests without faces. After tea, I carved a face into a red apple. The Hostess's sweet voice cut through the silent chatter, announcing that the dances would begin.

Bruder took my hand and asked me to dance with him. (I could reach his shoulder rather easily then, he didn't even need to bend down a bit.) The songs played from nowhere; some were blackberry jam, some were chocolates, some were crystallised ginger, some were treacle, all were waltzes. I danced blindfolded. Though I could remember the box step, my feet had forgotten it (as they hadn't waltzed in so long) and soon changed to the waltz I had learnt first, down-up-up, down-up-up, but they were still too slow to match the song's rhythm. Bruder smiled patiently. Finally, a slower waltz played; it didn't taste of sweets, only a starless night sky. Though it was such a death-like song, my feet were livelier than ever. Turning, then spinning, I fell into a dizzy sleep, but my feet danced faster and faster.

When the dance ended, the blindfold disappeared; though my eyes had opened, the room faded away (as did my feeling and my balance), and I heard myself land on the floor as though I had been standing beside myself. The room reappeared quickly, and I found the hostess standing over me, staring as though she were planning something. In that moment, I saw that the hostess was none other than Marienne (the girl Hans had been searching so sadly for). Upon hearing his name, her expression softened; 'Let's go Home together,' Bruder said. Before leaving, I contemplated whether or not I would eat the apple I'd carved (which I then realised was poisoned). I set it on the ground instead, and we walked together, Bruder, Schwester, Marienne, and I, away from the endless party in the endless night with its faceless guests.

I bathed in pumpkin and cinnamon and milk and honey and soap bubbles once Home. As we said our 'good night's, I leaned against Schwester's shoulder, which, naturally, surprised her. 'Just for now, please--?' Silently, she smiled a bit. I slept beside Bruder just as I had in that time when I always cried. 'Bruder?' I looked into his eyes, wider then than they are now (but just as gentle). 'You're going to disappear when morning comes, aren't you?' I could no longer look into his face. 'I don't want for you to disappear.' He smiled a little sadly and squeezed my hand. (I didn't see him smile a little sadly, but he always smiles a little sadly at me, especially when I cry.) I fell into a quiet sleep.

I woke to daylight and aloneness (as expected). Somehow, though, I'd felt as though nothing had been resolved, and, just as I'd thought that, I realised that I was still in Wonderland, still in that house I'd probably seen before and called Home.

Although I normally post photos and old-fashioned styled artwork, these images suit the story best; in order of first appearance, they are from: the animated music video for the song 'Mrs. Pumpkin's Comical Dream'; the opening video to the video game 'Zettai Meikyuu Grimm' (or 'Labyrinth of Grimm'); and the opening video to the animated adaptation of 'Umineko no Naku Koro ni' (or 'When the Seagulls Cry'). Also, please do excuse any technical difficulties; I tried to use a cut so that the post would not appear so lengthy on the main page, but it doesn't seem to be working, and now I can't delete it.

'I want to change'

All photos were taken by me.

'I want to change,' she said. She was herself, really, but she did not act it. Saying what she meant exactly and with a moderate crust made of cynicism (like sugared almonds but thicker)-- it wasn't her style. (And neither was being silent and melancholy every day.) So she would become a new and gentle wind--and be like a snake, shedding its old, rough skin which hides and restricts its real self. She was afraid of snakes, though. Instead, she would be like a candle--the flame that brightens after the excess wax is poured away (or shaken off by a careless hand)--yes, that is what I'll be: a candle, a little light.

Postscript: I am feeling so, so much better now that it is summer vacation (though I hate the heat). I was in a fashion show yesterday (it wasn't much, but it was my first time so I was excited). Also, I recently finished watching a Japanese animation series called Fairy Musketeers (or Otogi Juushi Akazukin), which I'd first heard of over a year ago on Skye's old blog, The Princess Portal, and the series is now one of my favourites. (My writing actually has a few references to two of the songs from it; I really like its music.) In a little over a week, I'll be leaving for England.

Waltz of the Moon

Mio Isayama - Tsuki no Waltz

Where are you? I am lost in the country of time.

Rainbow-Coloured Love Letter

Mio Isayama - Niji-Iro Love Letter

Every day, every day, I write you a love letter.